One thing stopping people from getting what they want is not having a clear, specific, actionable understanding of their dream (if that’s you, the Clarity Quest is an excellent place to start).
I also work with people who do know what they want (or figure it out during the Quest), but get stuck along the journey between the future they have a crush on and a reality they are living. One of the most important questions they need to answer along the way is, what are you willing to do to get what you want?
Committing to paying the cost in full
Once a Quester has a clear future anchor, I help them engage with a critical process:
Calculating the cost
Committing to paying that price in full
Creating the structure required to maintain consistent momentum in that direction.
Deciding what you are willing to do is a key part of that process. The road of risk and adventure can be daunting and your brain will do everything it can to keep you in a safe and comfortable space, even if that space is toxic and draining your energy.
Once you decide what you are willing to do (and not do) to get what you want, you have a massive head start.
For example, I sold my bakkie in order to take a course that I knew would help me get even more clarity and transform my business. It wasn’t an easy thing to do (and I still miss that bakkie), but I knew what I wanted and was committed to paying the price in full.
Look in your fears
When deciding what you are willing to do, the answers to your questions often lie in the same space as your fears.
A vehicle is often linked to security, pleasure, or status; would you be willing to give up one or more of those things to be able to live the life you want? Are you willing to quit your comfortable job and face the fear of not being able to provide in order to start the company you’ve been dreaming of? Are you willing to download Tinder and go on hundreds of dates despite what people might think of you because you have a clear idea of the kind of person you want a relationship with and just aren’t meeting them in your day-to-day?
Remember, the question is not, “What can you do to get what you want?” It is, “What are you willing to do?” Writing down a long list of all the things you can do is a good start, but until you decide what you are willing to do — no matter how scary, costly or far out — and commit to paying that price in full, you will remain stuck looking at your dream from afar.
CONSIDER
What is your bakkie? What is the one thing that you really absolutely don’t want to give up or start doing that know you actually could, if you were just willing?
What are the things you are most scared of giving up or doing? Are they livelihood things (you are the sole breadwinner and without your income your kids won’t be able to eat), or are they rooted in fears that you can overcome (meeting strangers is a terrifying thought but you crave companionship)?
What is the best possible outcome if you take action despite your fears? What is the worst possible outcome?