#81 Why You’re Losing Momentum and Why It Has Nothing to Do with Willpower
- Francois Esterhuizen
- Sep 8
- 3 min read
Updated: Oct 28
Losing momentum doesn’t mean you’ve lost discipline, it means you’ve lost connection with your “why.”
Francois Esterhuizen explains how the slow fade of disengagement begins and how to rebuild sustainable momentum through clarity and conscious action.
What if the real reason you are losing momentum on your most important projects has nothing to do with a lack of discipline or a sudden decision to quit?
We tend to think of quitting as a distinct
event, a single moment of decision. But more often, it is a gradual process, a slow fade. It happens in the small, almost imperceptible moments when a task becomes harder or more complex than we anticipated.
Instead of formally stopping, we just gently disengage.
We start dragging our feet, avoiding the difficult parts, and slowly backing away from the resistance.
This subtle retreat is far more corrosive to our self-confidence than an outright failure.
When we allow ourselves to fade out, we are not just quitting a project; we are quietly quitting on ourselves.
The anatomy of the slow fade
Any meaningful goal, whether it is building a business, transforming your health or deepening a relationship, will inevitably have its uphill parts.
Resistance is not a sign that you are on the wrong path; it is proof that you are attempting something that matters.
The slow fade begins when we misinterpret this resistance. We start to see it as evidence that we are not good enough, not meant for the task, or that it should not be this difficult. This internal narrative gives us permission to hold back, to slow down, and to let our initial momentum dissipate.
This is how "practice makes permanent" works against us. When we practice the habit of easing off when things get hard, it becomes our default response in every area of life.
How to counteract losing momentum
Sustaining effort through these difficult phases is not about brute force.
It is about shifting your focus to what you can actually control.
Anchor to your ‘why’. Before anything else, reconnect with the reason you started. Why did this goal matter so much in the first place? If that reason is still powerful and aligned with who you are, it becomes the fuel to push through resistance.
If it is not, you are faced with a different choice: either build a stronger ‘why’ or make a conscious decision to quit. An official, decisive quit is healthier than a slow, confidence-draining fade.
Focus on the next controllable step.
When faced with a complex challenge, it is easy to become overwhelmed by external factors you cannot control, like unpredictable technology or market shifts. Instead of investing energy there, channel it into the very next action you can take. Do not aim for a perfect plan or a guaranteed outcome.
Concentrate entirely on executing the next immediate step. That is where momentum is built and sustained.
Reframe your relationship with difficulty. Disappointment and discouragement are part of any worthwhile journey. They do not disqualify you. The temptation is to believe things should be fun and easy.
A more powerful question to ask is, "How can I enjoy doing hard things?" Much like a long-distance race is rewarding because it is hard, you can learn to find satisfaction in the process of overcoming resistance itself.
Your next move
The most damaging failure is not missing a goal; it is the internal act of abandoning yourself when the path gets steep. It is the belief that you are not allowed to struggle or that you are not good enough to overcome the challenge.
Look at where you feel you are losing momentum right now. It is likely not a single event, but a series of small withdrawals. Notice them without judgment. Acknowledging the fade is the first step. You can rest, you can pause, and you can try again from a different angle. You are not alone in the climb.
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Francois Esterhuizen is a trusted and sought-after clarity and leadership coach based in Stellenbosch, partnering online with South Africans worldwide. His work helps entrepreneurs and leaders turn emotional resistance into clarity, momentum, and meaningful growth.
